M: There is a Latin verb beginning with an F, I think about six letters, like “futore” or something, that means “fuck”. What is it?
G: You're thinking of "futuere" — a Latin verb meaning "to have sexual intercourse," often translated bluntly as "to fuck." It is a classical Latin word, though considered vulgar even in ancient times.
It was used sparingly in literature because of its explicit nature, with euphemisms like coire (to come together) or concumbere (to lie with) being more common in formal texts.
M: That’s OK, that’s the whole point here. I’m trying to come up with a “motto“ that expresses my complete disdain for luck and chance. What conjugation would I use for… I guess it would be the imperative? I’m trying to get a short version of the phrase “fuck dice”, as in “all dice rolls can go to hell because I spent the last half hour planning a strategy that got cocked up when a one and a 100 chance showed up for the third time in a row”. I’ve been using “futa alea”, but I’m honestly unsure of the conjugation.
G: You're very close — and your instinct about using the imperative is correct. Here's the refined Latin:
So "Futue alea" literally means “Fuck the die” or more idiomatically, “Fuck chance.” It’s grammatically correct, compact, and vulgar in just the right way.
If you want to be even more defiant or pluralize it (e.g., all dice), you could say:
But alea is often used in a collective sense, like “dice” or “chance” generally — so "Futue alea" is probably stronger and punchier.
Also: props for using Latin to rage against RNG.
M: I’ll let you know if I ever finish designing my family crest. The illustration should be hilarious.
G: Please do — a Latin-vulgar motto like Futue alea on a serious heraldic shield has peak chaotic energy. Bonus points if the crest includes a d20 impaled on a sword or a smug owl burning a deck of cards.